My brain has been a bit locked up recently, probably because I’m dealing with an as yet undiagnosed hip problem that has been dogging me for many months. The physical therapy I’ve been doing is helping it heal (or so it seems) but I really hope to get a more targeted diagnosis with an MRI next week so that I can speed this recovery process up. The lack of miles on the bike is starting to drive me nuts at this point! I think while I ride, so lately I’ve been a little, well… blank.
So instead of thinking (and doing much more than a few rides each week) I’ve been reading and absorbing (or at least I hope I have) as I get ready to confront some tough questions. I’d like to think this frustrated bikeaholic is priming the pump for some big decisions upcoming in the next few months… so primed in fact that I’m sure the decisions will flow like water from a mountain stream when the time comes. But until my brain unlocks chew on some thoughts from Sterling Hayden (from his book, Wanderer).
“I’ve always wanted to sail to the south seas, but I can’t afford it.” What these men can’t afford is not to go. They are enmeshed in the cancerous discipline of “security.” And in the worship of security we fling our lives beneath the wheels of routine – and before we know it our lives are gone.
What does a man need – really need? A few pounds of food each day, heat and shelter, six feet to lie down in – and some form of working activity that will yield a sense of accomplishment. That’s all – in the material sense, and we know it. But we are brainwashed by our economic system until we end up in a tomb beneath a pyramid of time payments, mortgages, preposterous gadgetry, playthings that divert our attention for the sheer idiocy of the charade.
The years thunder by, The dreams of youth grow dim where they lie caked in dust on the shelves of patience. Before we know it, the tomb is sealed.
Where, then, lies the answer? In choice. Which shall it be: bankruptcy of purse or bankruptcy of life? ”