I scratched from the ITI on the second day (click here to read about the carnage that 2-3 ft of fresh snow inflicted upon the race). After finding a reasonably priced early flight home, I’m at work today trying to reintegrate myself back into life. After having spent so much time, effort and money getting ready for the ITI, trying to not let the inevitable letdown that is associated with a failure like this get the best of me will be difficult. Sure, I can console myself with the knowledge that this was a particularly difficult year etc. and point toward the high number of those that pulled out of the race. But the fact remains that SOME people did push through the nasty conditions and are still out there pushing forward while I’m back here maneuvering a computer mouse around my desk – only myself to blame. Failures like this are problems awaiting a solution: I just need to figure out the puzzle.
I might jot some words down this weekend about what exactly transpired during the race as it’s my way of exorcising demons and moving on. Who knows? Maybe someone can learn from my experience too. Until then, this quote from Mark Twight sums up my thought process perfectly:
The risk of failure, social or physical is paramount because failure and dissatisfaction are the parents of thought. Success and fulfillment do not inspire or require introspection. For the goal-oriented individual falling short leads to an unsentimental self-assessment. The bigger the failure, the deeper one must cut to root out the cause and the harder one works to turn it to advantage. A former climbing partner once wrote that, “staying focused while truly opening oneself to actual risk of total failure beats specks of gold out of the dross that comprises the bulk of modern man’s existence.”